I posted all about Elias’s birth story, and this blog picks up where that one left off. Since he was born at 4:03AM, we didn’t actually get up to our hospital room until around 6AM. On the way, they had us drop him off in the nursery for his hearing test, first bath, and other checks. With Finn, I was able to stay with him for this whole process, but the nursery was so full when Elias was born that they didn’t offer to let me stay. And honestly, we were so tired from having been up half of the night that I think we both wanted to get in a little sleep, anyway.
So, not long after we checked into our room, we both fell into a deep sleep for a couple of hours. They brought Elias back to us at around 8AM, and we got up, fed him, and ordered ourselves breakfast.
Mimi came to meet her new grandson not long after, and she spent that first full day in the hospital with us. Elias slept the majority of his first 24 hrs, which is pretty common for newborns. So, since Mimi was there to keep Sona company, I decided to run home for a shower, to take care of the animals, and to pick up a few things.
Since the timing worked out, I decided that I would surprise Finn by picking him up at daycare and taking him to meet his new brother–something we’d all been exciting, but also very nervous, about.
When I walked into his class, he was sitting in his teacher’s lap and crying. She said he’d had a hard day. It wasn’t his normal “I’m being cranky” cry; it was his “I am so sad” cry, and it gutted me. He came up to me and, rather than being excited, he just hugged me and sobbed. Then, he pointed to our family photo on the daycare wall, putting his finger on Sona, and saying “mommy” over and over again. IT WAS THE SADDEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN.
His teacher gave him another one of our family photos to hold, and he refused to let it go. Needless to say, on the way to the hospital, I gave my mom and Sona a heads up that it might be a difficult introduction.
However, as soon as Finn walked into the hospital room and saw both Sona and his baby bro, he lit up. From that second on, he was totally fine, and what I realized is that it was his anxiety about the unknown–where would his mommies go? would we still be a family? would he be abandoned?–was much scarier for him than actually bringing a little brother home with him.
But ever since the second he met Elias, he has been totally enamored. I think we are all surprised, pleasantly, by how well he’s adjusting to having a baby around.
When he walked into the room of the hospital, we made sure–based on advice from friends–that no one was hold Elias. We didn’t want him to see us holding a baby as confirmation that he’d been replaced. Instead, Sona pulled him onto the bed and gave him big hugs. But immediately, he was interested in seeing his little bro.
“Do you want to get up on the bed so that you can get a closer look?” I asked. “Yeah!” he exclaimed.
We even had him sit on the bed for a bit with Elias in his lap, even though he didn’t love it. I think he’s still a little trepidatious about holding him, but he wants to pat him and bring him blankets and show him toys and say, “Hi, Elias!” in the sweetest voice you ever did hear.
We also made sure that “Elias” had a present for Finn–just to soften the blow. It worked like a charm.
We had planned for Mom to take Finn to the mall–his favorite place in the world–after leaving the hospital. We thought that would make it easier to get him to leave and help distract him from leaving us, again. That trick also worked, but as they were about to walk out the door, he asked “Can I see Elias?” once more.
Sona and I only spent one night in the hospital with Elias, as he was born on Tuesday at 4:03AM and we left on Wednesday afternoon. That one night was pretty seamless, though. The hospital staff woke us up more that Elias did.
Even though folks tried to urge us to stay the extra night, we were adamant that we wanted to get home to both of our boys. So, Elias was circumcised at around 10:30 on Wednesday morning, and we were able to leave two hours after that.
Even though we were so excited to head home, our time in the hospital was a great little respite. We had less visitors than last time, and Sona and I spent a lot of quiet time with our new little baby, which was just what we needed.
When I found this little pizza (Elias) shark (Finn) outfit, I knew we had to take him home in it!
It started hailing as we were about the leave the hospital, and there was a moment when I got all Momma Bear and copped an attitude with one of the nurses, so we didn’t get a photo of us as we were leaving, but we took this selfie as soon as we got home–right before we took him inside.
We had about 30 minutes between when we got home and when Finn got home from daycare. We used that time to settle in, introduce Elias to his new home, and feed him.
Finn was SO excited to come home to all of his family. All evening, he watched over his little bro, rushing for a blanket or toy as soon as Elias would start crying.
He also showed him all of his toys, even though Elias wasn’t a very interested audience.
We came home when Elias was only 36 hours old, and we felt so settled that we even cooked dinner that night. The first night of sleep wasn’t quite as smooth as the rest of the transition, though, but I’ll save that story for later.