Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.
-Kurt Vonnegut
Yeah, so Finn turned 13 months old this weekend, and I’m just now posting his cake smash photos. Don’t judge.
We knew we wanted to do a cake smash session with Finn, but we just haven’t found the time to do it. So, of course, we chose a weekend in which we already had a ton going on, a day on which he was sick, and a time at which he should’ve been napping. #MOMMYWIN
It was still TOTALLY worth it.
This ain’t nothin’ but a shameless photo dump of cake-y goodness. Eat your heart out, kid.
OVER IT!
I know I can’t expect anyone other than Finn’s mommas to watch a 13 minute video, recapping his first year of life. But it’s his birthday. And we’re feeling nostalgic like WHOA. And we love him more than you could possibly imagine (except if you’re a mom, too–and then you probably get it).
So, here it is. Happy birthday, Finn.
And if you want to read all about our birth story, you can find it here!
Okay, that title is inexcusable. Still, here’s some squashy-faced Finn for your Friday night enjoyment. Happy weekend!
Finn turned 8 months last week and, although I took the photo a day or two after, I’m just getting around to blogging it. There’s a lot going on in the our home, these days. đŸ˜‰
Finn’s 8th month brought a lot of excitement along with it. Most notably, Finn got his first passport stamps, as we went on our first international trip as a family! Of course, if you read about that trip, you also know that meant that he spent time in the ocean for the first time. And was stung by his first jelly fish. But still–firsts!
He’s also gotten much more steady when sitting on his own, and he can sit without assistance. Even though he still doesn’t roll over often, he can. We’ve seen him do it, and he will, if coaxed. We like to joke that we have the world’s laziest baby. Though, he’s started doing his fair share of scooting–backwards–all around the house. It’s his preferred method of mobility, right now.
Month 8 also brought with it a bit of challenge. The Separation Anxiety Monster has reared his ugly head, and Finn has struggled a bit. A lot of that likely has to do with having spent a couple of weeks with family while we traveled, and a lot of it has to do with the developmental stages he’s currently working through. Regardless, it has made for a few heartbroken mornings, as I slipped out after dropping him off at the nanny, leaving him crying, inside.
We’ve abandoned what little purees we were using, and Finn eats dinner with us each night. He eats whatever we eat, and we’ve yet to find something that this kind doesn’t like. He gets lunch with the nanny, too. So, meals are becoming a regular part of his daily routine.
More and more, Finn is transforming. He’s not really a baby, anymore. He’s a little boy. An expressive, lively, and silly little boy who is so, so loved.
Wonders never cease. I’ve actually stuck to one of my NY resolutions: to take a photograph of Finn every single day for a year, using my DSLR. (In other words: to try and use more sophisticated camera equipment than, say, an iPhone to capture a year of Finn’s life.)
For the most part, I’m adhering to the rules I set for myself at the start of this challenge. There are still a few things I need to work on, though.
Namely, I need to be a little better about taking my camera out of the house. I have, on a few occasions, but most of the time, I’m taking photos of Finn in our home. Which is very small. And has terrible light.
We’ve also been really busy, lately, for lots of reasons. As a result, I often forget to take a photo until the end of the evenings, and we’re amassing an obscene amount of photos in the final hours of the day. I swear my child wears more than just pajamas!
And, of course, I’m still not actually in many photos, myself.
I’ll work on those things, but I’m still pretty darn impressed with the fact that I’ve managed to stay committed to this project for over two months. When I was home with Finn during the first 4 months of his life, I took a dozen photos every hour. There are, literally, THOUSANDS.
Lately, these daily DSLR photos are the only pictures we have of our little guy. I’m glad I’m being intentional about taking them.
Want to check them all out? Follow Finn (or, er, us) on Instagram: @allthefinn.
Most of our time in Virgin Gorda was spent doing something that Sona and I don’t usually do on vacation: relaxing. Because our little villa–and the area it was in–had so much to offer, we spent a good portion of our time at either the pool or at Mahoe Bay, which was the beach we were on.
Because we were a little nervous about Finn spending too much time in the sun, it was really convenient to be on the beach, allowing us hour-long spurts in the water before heading back to the comfort and shade of our villa. And back to the blender. And back to the fruity drinks.
A typical day went like this: wake up, eat breakfast outside (with a view of the water, of course), throw on our swimsuits, spend a little time at the beach, come back and put Finn down for a nap, hang out at the pool and have some cocktails (hello, adult time), go explore the island a little after Finn’s nap, come back and swim some more, another nap, pick up something for dinner, having a leisurely meal outside, play in the jacuzzi, take showers, put Finn to sleep, unwind. In other words: BLISS.
We did get out a bit, though, and we explored the entire island. Sometimes, we took Finn with us. Sometimes, we left him at home with my parents.
One day, we decided to take a ferry to Bitter End Yacht Club, which is on a side of the island not accessible by car. Once we got to the ferry terminal and realized how strong and warm the sun was, we got a little nervous. We were going to be isolated from our home base, we’d have to rely on hourly ferries to return, we were going to take a hike in direct sunlight, and Finn would likely be missing a nap or two. I think Sona and I both felt like we’d made a mistake.
Nonetheless, we pushed on. Sona wore Finn in the Ergo for our hike, which only lasted 30 minutes or so. It was HOT, and the sun was blaring, but we did our best to keep him covered. At the end of our hike, we had a fantastic lunch at Fat Virgin’s before heading back to BEYC.
Finn actually really enjoyed that day, and he didn’t get cranky until the very end of it, as we were only a few minutes from our villa. He lasted a good 6 hours without much of a nap, aside from a quick sleep he stole during the walk. He even spent our entire lunch, flirting with the girls at the next table. Their family kept saying that Finn was “SUCH a good baby”–something we heard a lot during the week. We were impressed with our little man.
The views from the north end of the island are unparalleled, and we were all really happy to have taken a chance and moved forward with our plans. I’m imagining that Sona and I will experience a lot of that “should we/shouldn’t we?” confusion that comes with traveling with a baby, especially our first baby. So far, most always, we err on the side of adventure and decide that, yes, we should. And, so far, that’s always paid off.
An advantage of having my parents around was that Sona and I could also take off by ourselves, a bit. We left Finn at home while exploring Virgin Gorda’s most well-known attraction: The Baths. Since we’d heard that the trek to and through The Baths involved quite a bit of crawling, squatting, climbing (up ladders and over boulders), and whatnot, we knew that we could only fully experience it without a baby. Once we got there, we realized we’d made the right decision.
This is the famous “cathedral” in The Baths. BEAUTIFUL.
We went early enough to miss the large cruise groups, which arrived about half an hour after we did.
Sona had a blast, climbing all of the boulders. I had a blast watching her.
We really enjoyed the 20-25 minute walk through the boulders, leading us from the beach at The Baths to Devil’s Bay. It’s a tricky little walk, as you have to meander through a maze of boulders, tidal pools, and narrow crevices, but it was, like most things, so worth it.
Spring Bay, which is right before The Baths, is a little easier to explore and is, mostly, free of touristy crowds. We really enjoyed an afternoon there, too.
Mostly, we enjoyed the view from our villa.
And Finn enjoyed the pool.
This is the view from Hog Heaven.
Finn wasn’t as impressed as the rest of us.
Savannah Bay, which had the most vividly blue water I’ve ever seen, was another favorite. Though, the current was a bit too rough to snorkel.
Finn enjoyed some exploring, too. Maybe a little too much.
Our last night, we went out to dinner at Coco Maya, an Asian-inspired tapas restaurant that rests on a little private beach, complete with a bonfire. It was the perfect way to punctuate our trip.
While our trip home was a bit of a trial–we had quite the fiasco at the St. Thomas airport, had to take a car ride, a ferry, two plane rides, and another car ride home, and nearly missed our connecting flight, causing us to forgo a real meal for most of the day–it was all still worth it. I joked with Sona, “Travel days are kind of like having a baby. The labor itself is pretty awful, but the aftermath is so wonderful that you forget how much you suffered. And, before long, you’re ready to do it all over, again.”
That is, we’ll be traveling again with Finn–and soon. Mostly, it was much easier than we’d anticipated, and we’ve already realized some things we would and wouldn’t do, again. (That’ll be another post, later.)
As for Virgin Gorda, it has bumped itself up to being one of our two favorite islands in the Caribbean, trailing very closely behind Anguilla.
If you are lucky enough to visit, here are some things we’d recommend:
Do:
Rent a villa, preferably on Mahoe Bay
Rent a car, using Mahogany Car Rental, allowing you to explore the beautiful island
Drive from The Baths to Gun Greek, stopping at all of the lookouts
Explore The Baths, following the yellow arrows through the caves, leading to Devil’s Bay
Snorkel at Mahoe Bay and Mountain Trunk
Spend the day at Bitter End Yacht Club, hiking to Fat Virgin’s for lunch
Scuba dive at the Rhone shipwreck (something my parents really enjoyed)
See:
Savannah Bay (very little shade available, come prepared)
Spring Bay (picnic tables and limited shade available)
The view from Hog Heaven, which you should enjoy while drinking a BBC
The murals in front of the island’s school, which you’ll pass on the way to The Baths
Eat:
Takeout BBQ from Island Pot (probably my favorite restaurant in VG)
CocoMaya (make a reservation and order the pork belly fried rice)
Top of the Baths (great gazpacho and the view is amazing)
Erika’s home-cooked Caribbean food (one of the island’s private chefs who made dinner for us twice–best food we ate all week)
Hog Heaven (BBQ isn’t as good as Island Pot, IMO, but it’s still worth a lunch trip)
What We Missed, This Time:
Gumption’s tour to Necker Island (we would LOVE to see the lemurs and the flamingos, but the 6-hour excursion was too much with Finn)
Hike the summit trail at BEYC
Spend an afternoon at Saba Rock (maybe a little touristy, but a lot of people recommended it)
That’s my wife–the only person on any St. Thomas beach, wearing a flannel shirt and leggings. Gotta love her.
We got back from our first Caribbean trip with Finn late Saturday night. Despite a few hiccups, the trip was–mostly–a success. At least, he made it home alive (and so did we).
We got into St. Thomas early in the evening, last Friday. Of course, the first thing I wanted to do was rip off our travel clothes, put on our swimsuits, and introduce Finn to the ocean, despite Sona protesting that he desperately needed a nap. He did, but I pushed on. “Just a few minutes!” I begged.
I love this photo:Â Me. My son. The Caribbean. His first ocean experience. Sunset.
About two seconds after it was taken, though, Finn and I were both stung by a jellyfish. MOM FAIL. How’s that for luck? I’ve spent countless hours of my life in the ocean, and I’ve never been stung. I take my infant son in for five minutes, and he gets mauled!
I felt a strong burn on my arm at about the same time Finn started screaming, madly. I rushed him to the shore, where my parents and Sona looked on, and told them that I thought we’d been stung.
Panic ensued. Sona’s mama bear instincts kicked in HARD, and she was ready to end our trip to the Caribbean the same day it started.
An hour of screaming later, a leg doused in vinegar, a rushed trip to a drug store for baby Benadryl, and a call to our pediatrician’s emergency line, we were able to settle Finn down for a nap.
Our nerves were fried, but we rallied.
The next morning, Finn was back to his normal self. And, from that moment on, you’d never know anything had happened. He rocked a pretty gnarly scar for the whole week. “Chicks dig scars,” Pops kept reminding him.
He was fine. I think Sona and I may have lost a few years of our lives, though.
After a lazy morning in St. Thomas, we boarded a ferry and headed to Virgin Gorda. We were all happy to leave STT behind!
Finn slept the entire ferry ride. Mimi got sea sick. Sona and I ate snacks.
Despite being a little unsure about the water the first day (a hesitance he’d earned rightfully, I guess), Finn really took to Virgin Gorda–as did we all. The island is a beautiful tangle of wild, empty beaches, lush hilly landscapes, and water views around every single corner. I’ve never seen so many shades of blue. It has also resisted commercialization, which was the largest appeal for us.
We rented a villa in Mahoe Bay, which proved to be a great home base with a baby. Finn felt immediately comfortable, and he slept even more than he normally does while on the island. (And he normally sleeps A LOT.) It was nice to have a “home,” complete with a full kitchen, a shaded outdoor space, a private pool, a high chair, and a pack ‘n play.
While Finn napped, we could hangout at the pool, which was within earshot. If he got a little fussy, we didn’t feel like we were ruining anyone else’s vacation. For dinner, we mostly grabbed some takeout and dined al fresco. Sona could pump at the pool. We could make our own fruity drinks and not feel judged for sipping them with our baby in our laps. Finn took quite a few naked dips in the hot tub.
The benefits of renting a villa, especially with a baby in tow, are really endless.
He did eventually warm up to the water, and we spent pretty much all day at either the pool or the beach. That is, when Finn wasn’t napping.
We were super cautious about the sun, dousing Finn in baby sunscreen and dressing him in granny-appropriate swimwear. He’ll hate us for these photos, one day, but we think he looked hilariously adorable.
Being overseas with a baby wasn’t nearly as challenging as we’d expected, despite the exhaustion that comes with long travel days (the trip home was especially brutal) and the unfortunate run-in with a jellyfish. Having my parents around really helped, as Sona and I got to take off a couple days and explore the island on our own. “Like old times,” we reminisced. Of course, a part of us missed that freedom, but the ability to share our travels with Finn overshadowed that nostalgia.
We went into the trip with reasonable expectations of what we would–and wouldn’t–be able to do with a baby, and I think that was key.
More about our trip–and a lot more photos–coming, soon! I’ll also be sure to post advice on what to do, where to stay, and what to eat while in Virgin Gorda, next time.
I am 15 days in on my 365 day DSLR photo challenge and, so far, I haven’t missed a day. I know, I know–there’s a whole 350 days to go. Still, I’m appreciating the small miracles.
15 days in, here are some things I’ve realized:
And now, the photos:
If you look through my laptop files, you’ll (literally) find hundreds of photos from Finn’s first month of life. HUNDREDS. But if you look at the most recent folder, labeled “Finn’s 5th month,” you’ll only find a handful.
That’s true of most parents, I’m sure. It’s not that the novelty of having a new baby wears off that quickly, it’s just that life stops catering to the fact that you are a new parent, and other things begin to get in the way. There are more expectations outside of parenting, and those things take time away from spending all day, documenting every move your little one makes.
So, I’ve found myself reaching for my camera less and less. Life is busy, and, when I do get a chance to snap a quick photo of Finn, I usually just reach for my phone. As a result, my iPhone is overloaded with quick snapshots of varying quality, and we have less and less “good” photos of Finn.
Of course, as a photographer, my expectations of a “good photo” are higher than most. I look at photos for a living, and no matter how cute and candid they may be, iPhone pictures just don’t live up to what I know my DSLR is capable of.
Enter: the 365 Day DSLR Challenge, which I saw a couple photog moms participating in on social media. The premise is simple: take a photo of Finn every day for a year, using my “good” camera (a Canon 5D Mark III).
One of my new years resolutions was to begin the challenge on February 1st, but I kind of forgot. Good job sticking to those resolutions, Danielle! But I remembered, eventually, and started on Sunday, February 6th. So, here’s my vow, Internets: I will photograph Finn every single day until February 6, 2017.
In order to make this challenge manageable, I’ve set some rules/goals for myself. Here they are:
I’ll share the photos, as I edit them. I’ll probably post them more regularly on Finn’s Instagram account (@allthefinn). Here are the first three.
This is going to take some serious dedication, and I’m not always the best at seeing things through to the end. Nonetheless, I know the results of this challenge will be something we cherish forever, and that should be enough to keep me going.